What To Do Immediately When a Loved One Dies
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February 15, 2025
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When someone you love dies, the grief can be overwhelming and the last thing you want to do is jump right into a mountain of paperwork and end-of-life formalities, but there are five main things you will need to do in the immediate days following their passing. By knowing what you need to do right away, you’ll help yourself and family prepare to fulfill your loved one’s personal wishes and legal requirements.
Obtain A Legal Declaration of Death
If your loved one died in a hospital, nursing home or under hospice care, staff will be able to declare the death official so you can obtain a death certificate which is needed to plan a funeral and handle all legal affairs. If the death happened unexpectedly or at home, you could call 911 and have your loved one transported to a hospital where a medical professional can make a declaration of death.
Notify Family, Friends and Employer
Having to tell family and friends that your loved one has passed away is a difficult but necessary part of the process. You might not have the strength to do it on your own, so asking another family member to help with notification might help with sharing the difficult news. Ways to communicate include making individual phone calls, sending a mass email or sharing on social media on both your account and your loved one’s if you have access. If you can access contacts within their phone or email account, you may find additional friends or coworkers who should be notified. If your loved one was working, it’s important to contact their employer so they can handle paperwork, redistribute work they were responsible for and give you a chance to talk to a human resources specialist about any death benefits that are offered or that your loved one secured for you or a surviving spouse.
Make Funeral and Burial Arrangements
If you never had the conversation with your loved one, look for any documented instructions on what they desired for their funeral and burial. You may find that there was a burial site prepaid for, a local funeral home they preferred or the type of memorial stone or urn they wanted. If nothing can be found, it’s important to have a family meeting about arrangements, funeral location, burial type and location and what wishes your family can afford to fulfill.
Additional factors may include: If their remains need to be transported to another state, you’ll need to coordinate with a local funeral home and one in the state of their final resting place. If the person was in the military, contact the Veterans Administration as they typically offer benefits such as a military salute at the funeral.
Identify family and friends who can help you plan the service, arrange for funeral flowers, serve as pallbearers, give the eulogy or write the obituary should you choose to share the announcement of the death publicly.
Secure Your Loved One’s Personal Effects
Whether it’s their house, a room at a nursing home, their vehicle, or any other valuables such as jewelry or money, it’s important to make sure they are locked up and secure. If your loved one had pets that need to be cared for, arrange for a relative or friend to take care of them or pay for a pet hotel until a permanent plan can be made. Let a trusted neighbor know about the situation and ask if they can keep an eye on their place and take in any mail they receive until their mail can be forwarded to you or their executor (if it’s not you). Visit the local post office and put in a forwarding request to avoid missing important bills or notices.
Start Gathering Important Documents
Obtain multiple certified copies of the death certificate, as you will need it to register the death with government agencies (such as the Social Security Administration, etc.), file insurance claims and close bank accounts. Start making a list of assets that you will need documentation for, such as bank accounts, retirement funds, property deeds, etc. as well as a list of possible outstanding debt that will need to be resolved such as a mortgage payment, credit card bills or medical bills. Look for a will and testament or any documents indicating whom they designated as their executor. If you can’t find this information, a probate court judge will name an administrator to manage the settling of their estate. Probate is the process of legally executing a will to ensure debts are paid and assets are transferred to proper beneficiaries.
There are additional documents you will likely need as well as to-do’s you will be responsible for in the weeks following your loved one’s death and an attorney that specializes in estate settlement may be of great assistance. Steps After Life can help connect you with the resources you need to handle personal and legal obligations so you can focus on the grieving and healing process.